Stealing from a friend, a young mother with two smart, precocious daughters--
They were in the grocery, picking up items, and came to a blocked aisle where two older women were talking, their carts firmly blocking passage, and oblivious to other shoppers trying to pass.
Her 3-year-old daughter suddenly yelled "AhhOOOGa!" (where did she learn that?)
She said the two women jumped about a foot in the air, came down and hastily moved their carts so the mother and her daughters could pass. Go, Bailey!
This nice-mannered mother passed with embarassment--and also satisfaction. Brilliant child. Simply brilliant. At three, she already knows how to get things done.
The other day, I was pulling into a handicapped space (my knees are bad, and my lower back has a kick), when my 8-year-old said, "Gramma, when I grow up, I think I might like to have just a little handicap. Then I will always be able to find a parking place."
When I quit laughing, I told her that good legs and backs are much better than handicap parking places, which really aren't always there, anyway.
Well, she sees the silver lining. And so do I. Life is much more doable today for persons with disabilities. I have a ramp over the steps to my front door, put in by the last owner in a wheelchair.The ramp is much better for my knees, and many of my friends. And easy for everyone, really.
This spring, I will plant some Knockout Earthkind roses that will grow 4x4, hide the ramp from the street, and bloom May to December.
And I will keep listening for the advice of the children I know.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Christmases Then and Now
On Christmas Day, about 25 years ago, we opened some gifts from an office friend and found three Santa hats.
It had been a lean year. I think that may have been the year I sold a gold ring to buy a Christmas tree and Christmas dinner.
She had wrapped what at the time I thought was a load of crap so the boys would have stuff to open. Paper clips? Postits? But they DID enjoy the unwrapping, and laughing over the triviality. And they loved the hats. They put them on. I can still remember how cute the youngest was in his hat, both of them chuckling.
But I was full of bitterness. Overflowing with it. I felt pitied, not loved. Sometimes kindness can be the deepest cut of all.
And I, without benefit of chemicals or anything alcoholic, went berserk.
What I remember, what we all remember and can now laugh about, was that I ran into the kitchen for my treasured best scissors (wonder what happened to those? can't find those anymore) and I began to cut that hat up into many, many pieces. Which I then threw on the floor and jumped-jumped! -up and down on repeatedly. Presumably noisily.
I have never behaved so before or since in my life.
I didn't touch THEIR hats. No, no. But do you think they wore them the rest of the day?
I still remember a glimpse of the bewildered, hurt, frightened youngest son, about 6, taking off his hat.
And since no permanent insanity, nor drugs, nor alcohol was involved, the rest of Christmas Day went on pleasantly. I hope. There was a witness. A lifelong friend of my oldest was there and apparently marveled.
I still remember how good it felt to go berserk. To jump up and down on those scraps of hat. But I hurt my family. They have long since forgiven me and laughed about it. Recently, so have I.
For a long time, it rankled.
Christmas hats became an icon for my lack of control over what happened at the holidays, both what I couldn't control in my life, and what I did when I reacted. As such, I wasn't fond of them.
I thanked the co-worker again, and she was so pleased she sent more stuff the next Christmas. No Santa hats, though, because we had those, didn't we? Did I ever confront her? No, I didn't. Even then, I had the sense to understand she truly meant well. I think my Nana used to say something about not slapping the outstretched hand even when you wanted to.
Life went on. I gained a little wisdom.
Despite a graduate degree, I have never chosen work that pays well. It has been fulfilling. Meaningful. And we always had enough.
I'm retired now. I still work, but for free. And I have come to realize, I not only have enough, but more than enough. When you add the wealth of family I really love and like to be with and friends, ditto, I am actually filthy rich.
All these years later, I look back at that berserker woman with amusement at what she still had to learn. Bitterness grows no fruit. Love does. I forgave both her and myself. That's what I mean when I say I gained a little wisdom.
Today, I bought two Santa hats for my granddaughters, who both have performances upcoming requiring holiday gear. They look adorable.
Heck, I may go back and get a Santa hat for me.
It had been a lean year. I think that may have been the year I sold a gold ring to buy a Christmas tree and Christmas dinner.
She had wrapped what at the time I thought was a load of crap so the boys would have stuff to open. Paper clips? Postits? But they DID enjoy the unwrapping, and laughing over the triviality. And they loved the hats. They put them on. I can still remember how cute the youngest was in his hat, both of them chuckling.
But I was full of bitterness. Overflowing with it. I felt pitied, not loved. Sometimes kindness can be the deepest cut of all.
And I, without benefit of chemicals or anything alcoholic, went berserk.
What I remember, what we all remember and can now laugh about, was that I ran into the kitchen for my treasured best scissors (wonder what happened to those? can't find those anymore) and I began to cut that hat up into many, many pieces. Which I then threw on the floor and jumped-jumped! -up and down on repeatedly. Presumably noisily.
I have never behaved so before or since in my life.
I didn't touch THEIR hats. No, no. But do you think they wore them the rest of the day?
I still remember a glimpse of the bewildered, hurt, frightened youngest son, about 6, taking off his hat.
And since no permanent insanity, nor drugs, nor alcohol was involved, the rest of Christmas Day went on pleasantly. I hope. There was a witness. A lifelong friend of my oldest was there and apparently marveled.
I still remember how good it felt to go berserk. To jump up and down on those scraps of hat. But I hurt my family. They have long since forgiven me and laughed about it. Recently, so have I.
For a long time, it rankled.
Christmas hats became an icon for my lack of control over what happened at the holidays, both what I couldn't control in my life, and what I did when I reacted. As such, I wasn't fond of them.
I thanked the co-worker again, and she was so pleased she sent more stuff the next Christmas. No Santa hats, though, because we had those, didn't we? Did I ever confront her? No, I didn't. Even then, I had the sense to understand she truly meant well. I think my Nana used to say something about not slapping the outstretched hand even when you wanted to.
Life went on. I gained a little wisdom.
Despite a graduate degree, I have never chosen work that pays well. It has been fulfilling. Meaningful. And we always had enough.
I'm retired now. I still work, but for free. And I have come to realize, I not only have enough, but more than enough. When you add the wealth of family I really love and like to be with and friends, ditto, I am actually filthy rich.
All these years later, I look back at that berserker woman with amusement at what she still had to learn. Bitterness grows no fruit. Love does. I forgave both her and myself. That's what I mean when I say I gained a little wisdom.
Today, I bought two Santa hats for my granddaughters, who both have performances upcoming requiring holiday gear. They look adorable.
Heck, I may go back and get a Santa hat for me.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Noticing the Creature Comforts in the Night
Last night, another cold front came through, dropping the overnight temps to freezing here or thereabouts. In an older house, the thermostat is constantly catching up, and I keep it 68 or lower at night. The wood floor was a mite chilly when I had to get up briefly around 4 am. Still sleepy, I slipped gratefully back into the still warmed bedding and pulled the cover over my shoulders.
I was warm, cozy, snug. The bed was soft. Had a moment of thanksgiving for the luxury, and as I drifted back to sleep, I realized I didn't feel any age at all. I just felt like me. The always me that's been there since childhood.
And I was content.
I slept well.
I was warm, cozy, snug. The bed was soft. Had a moment of thanksgiving for the luxury, and as I drifted back to sleep, I realized I didn't feel any age at all. I just felt like me. The always me that's been there since childhood.
And I was content.
I slept well.
Friday, November 26, 2010
You want good stuffing? Smell your way!
I love Thanksgiving turkey. For many years, when I have leftovers, one of my favorites is the after-Thanksgiving turkey sandwich:
2 pieces of multi-grain bread, toasted.
mayonnaise to suit.
slices of turkey-white, dark, does not matter
slices of dressing
slices of cranberry sauce
sliced piminto olives
lettuce
All told, should be about 1 inch thick. Great on an empty stomach. Even greater in a lay between still-high Johnson grass on a quail hunt. Hot coffee optional. Air should be cold.
BUT this year, I made the best dressing I've made in years. It's purely my Dad's recipe, which relies on smell. If you can't smell, don't try it. I mean it. I have a lazy eye. Can't hit a ball. Don't try baseball anymore. If you don't smell smells, a great many don't. Other recipes will suit.
You probably can do many things I can't, and I envy you.
I happen to have a nose, as did my father, and it is critical to this. It is not rocket science. just organic. You must notice your sense of smell.
I guess this is a commercial. I've tried several cornmeals. my favorite is Aunt Jemima, and that is the recipe I use, sans sugar.
Several days ahead, buy a loaf of white bread, let it lie around.
reheat oven 425 degrees
In sifter(check internet if term is unfamiliar)
Add 1 Cup cornmeal
1 Cup flour
4 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
Sift into bowl
Add:
1 egg
1 Cup milk
1/4 Cup vegetable oil
Stir
Add to 8X8 pan, buttered or whatever, greased
Bake 20-23 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean. Let sit briefly, THEN
Cool briefly, then plop int LARGE mixing bowl
Fresh cornbread. Break up.
Take 4-5 slices stale white bread and toast. Don't burn it, but really toast it.
Slice bread into bite size pieces. Toss with crumbled cornbread.
On slicer board,
Slice 3/4 large onion in itty-bitty pieces
Slice three ribs celery in 1/4 inch pieces, approx.
One tart apple, peeled, quartered, and diced
Melt 1 stick margarine in skillet, add onions, celery and apple, on low medium till smells good. Shuffle with spatula
Add black pepper to taste
Add one can chicken broth,while warm
3 Tablespoons fresh poultry seasoning,
2 Tablespoons sage
Stir. Add to cornbread/toast in big bowl
Stir.
Smell. It's up to you whether to add second can of broth now or when you dump the first and heat up the second. You WILL use 2. How does it smell? How moist is the mixture? Stir.
Add 2cd can broth to cornbread/toast mixture. Refrigerate at least 4 hours,
Let it sit, and smell. Smell. My father said when it smells right, it is right, and this year, it smelled perfect. And it was the best I've made in years.
This recipe will serve a family of six, 4 large men or 8 regular adults who don't work out much.
Or half of it will feed two adult sons and their mother, when said sons have been deprived of their mother's efforts in the kitchen for a few years. Let it sit in the refrigerator a few hours, then bake at 350 for one hour.
You may like gravy. you won' t need it with this. It should be moist when done.
Personally, I find gravy really overrated. I am in an extreme minority,That's okay. My sons tell me the gravy was good over this.
To me, what I have said is easy, but I know so many assemble rather than cook. Don't use a mix--scratch makes higher, tastier, cornbread. Glad to anwer questions.
2 pieces of multi-grain bread, toasted.
mayonnaise to suit.
slices of turkey-white, dark, does not matter
slices of dressing
slices of cranberry sauce
sliced piminto olives
lettuce
All told, should be about 1 inch thick. Great on an empty stomach. Even greater in a lay between still-high Johnson grass on a quail hunt. Hot coffee optional. Air should be cold.
BUT this year, I made the best dressing I've made in years. It's purely my Dad's recipe, which relies on smell. If you can't smell, don't try it. I mean it. I have a lazy eye. Can't hit a ball. Don't try baseball anymore. If you don't smell smells, a great many don't. Other recipes will suit.
You probably can do many things I can't, and I envy you.
I happen to have a nose, as did my father, and it is critical to this. It is not rocket science. just organic. You must notice your sense of smell.
I guess this is a commercial. I've tried several cornmeals. my favorite is Aunt Jemima, and that is the recipe I use, sans sugar.
Several days ahead, buy a loaf of white bread, let it lie around.
reheat oven 425 degrees
In sifter(check internet if term is unfamiliar)
Add 1 Cup cornmeal
1 Cup flour
4 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
Sift into bowl
Add:
1 egg
1 Cup milk
1/4 Cup vegetable oil
Stir
Add to 8X8 pan, buttered or whatever, greased
Bake 20-23 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean. Let sit briefly, THEN
Cool briefly, then plop int LARGE mixing bowl
Fresh cornbread. Break up.
Take 4-5 slices stale white bread and toast. Don't burn it, but really toast it.
Slice bread into bite size pieces. Toss with crumbled cornbread.
On slicer board,
Slice 3/4 large onion in itty-bitty pieces
Slice three ribs celery in 1/4 inch pieces, approx.
One tart apple, peeled, quartered, and diced
Melt 1 stick margarine in skillet, add onions, celery and apple, on low medium till smells good. Shuffle with spatula
Add black pepper to taste
Add one can chicken broth,while warm
3 Tablespoons fresh poultry seasoning,
2 Tablespoons sage
Stir. Add to cornbread/toast in big bowl
Stir.
Smell. It's up to you whether to add second can of broth now or when you dump the first and heat up the second. You WILL use 2. How does it smell? How moist is the mixture? Stir.
Add 2cd can broth to cornbread/toast mixture. Refrigerate at least 4 hours,
Let it sit, and smell. Smell. My father said when it smells right, it is right, and this year, it smelled perfect. And it was the best I've made in years.
This recipe will serve a family of six, 4 large men or 8 regular adults who don't work out much.
Or half of it will feed two adult sons and their mother, when said sons have been deprived of their mother's efforts in the kitchen for a few years. Let it sit in the refrigerator a few hours, then bake at 350 for one hour.
You may like gravy. you won' t need it with this. It should be moist when done.
Personally, I find gravy really overrated. I am in an extreme minority,That's okay. My sons tell me the gravy was good over this.
To me, what I have said is easy, but I know so many assemble rather than cook. Don't use a mix--scratch makes higher, tastier, cornbread. Glad to anwer questions.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
A good day, unread, is still a good day
Frankly, there are quite a few influential, some even famous, people I know or have known--and past tense is probably the kicker--in my life.
I live quietly and obscurely now, and that's okay.
But my sitemaster tells me I am barely read, and that hurts. I write well. I know that for a fact.But apparently I don't care about or notice the things the rest of the world is interested in. Darn. Too many old duffers don't blog.
In my personal life, things are well. Had two grandkids and their best friends most of the day today. For me, it doesn't get better. I'm not stellar in their lives either, but being part of the bedrock--that feels good.
And at the end of the day, I sent all four home to my son and his wife to shelter for the night while I relaxed, wrote this, and went to bed early.
Smile.
I live quietly and obscurely now, and that's okay.
But my sitemaster tells me I am barely read, and that hurts. I write well. I know that for a fact.But apparently I don't care about or notice the things the rest of the world is interested in. Darn. Too many old duffers don't blog.
In my personal life, things are well. Had two grandkids and their best friends most of the day today. For me, it doesn't get better. I'm not stellar in their lives either, but being part of the bedrock--that feels good.
And at the end of the day, I sent all four home to my son and his wife to shelter for the night while I relaxed, wrote this, and went to bed early.
Smile.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Giving thanks in the face of adversity
Every state has its own list of what it supports, and what it does not.
Texas actually came out ahead in the short run on the deficit, because the state pays very little for anything besides roads, prisons, education,minimal social services,and law enforcement, but not in that order.
The legislature faces a $28 billion dollar shortfall. Legislature will be in session next year.
Beware. Euphoric Republicans are celebrating the fact that they now have the largest majority in the state legislature since Reconstuction. And I don't trust either party in a euphoric, "we're the 800-pound gorilla" mood.
A balloon has already been floated by our governor-who-isn't-running-for-President proposing cancelling Medicaid and CHIPS. Supposedly, we can fund this cheaper ourselves without any federal money. Even with Medicaid and CHIPS, Texas currently has either 5 million or 6 million uninsured.
Medical professionals are already saying this is nuts.
Fact is, Texas hasn't got much fat to trim. Politicians will have to go into the muscle.
One of the things I've learned is--we all want cuts in government spending, just not the program that directly benefits us. So it all is going to come down to who screams louder. The elderly with dementia, the homeless and mentally ill, the minor children who are being neglected or abused, these folks can't scream too loudly. The shell game with taxes and who funds education is apt to leave all but two state universities--Texas A&M and the University of Texas are protected by the state constitution--to be forced to raise tuition again as state support wanes further. School districts forced to fire teachers they can no longer afford to pay? Could happen. More potholes in the highways? less bridge maintenance? More toll roads? that's a big favorite. There are locations in the Metroplex I can't get to without a detailed pondering of highways if I don't want to pay several dollars in tolls for the trip.
The recession hasn't been fun. Nope. And whether we like it or not, the consequences are setting in. The debts always have to be paid. Most of us will survive.
Sounds grim on a holiday week, but the first Thanksgiving was celebrated by less than half the Mayflower passengers who set out for America. The others died. Those remaining gave thanks for their survival, for being alive. They looked forward to surviving another year, and making it better if they could. They gave thanks for each other.
That isn't bleak. That's core to the best of humanity. It requires steadfastness. Resolution. Hopefully a lack of self-absorption. Being alert as well.
Thar still be some bars in them thar woods.
Texas actually came out ahead in the short run on the deficit, because the state pays very little for anything besides roads, prisons, education,minimal social services,and law enforcement, but not in that order.
The legislature faces a $28 billion dollar shortfall. Legislature will be in session next year.
Beware. Euphoric Republicans are celebrating the fact that they now have the largest majority in the state legislature since Reconstuction. And I don't trust either party in a euphoric, "we're the 800-pound gorilla" mood.
A balloon has already been floated by our governor-who-isn't-running-for-President proposing cancelling Medicaid and CHIPS. Supposedly, we can fund this cheaper ourselves without any federal money. Even with Medicaid and CHIPS, Texas currently has either 5 million or 6 million uninsured.
Medical professionals are already saying this is nuts.
Fact is, Texas hasn't got much fat to trim. Politicians will have to go into the muscle.
One of the things I've learned is--we all want cuts in government spending, just not the program that directly benefits us. So it all is going to come down to who screams louder. The elderly with dementia, the homeless and mentally ill, the minor children who are being neglected or abused, these folks can't scream too loudly. The shell game with taxes and who funds education is apt to leave all but two state universities--Texas A&M and the University of Texas are protected by the state constitution--to be forced to raise tuition again as state support wanes further. School districts forced to fire teachers they can no longer afford to pay? Could happen. More potholes in the highways? less bridge maintenance? More toll roads? that's a big favorite. There are locations in the Metroplex I can't get to without a detailed pondering of highways if I don't want to pay several dollars in tolls for the trip.
The recession hasn't been fun. Nope. And whether we like it or not, the consequences are setting in. The debts always have to be paid. Most of us will survive.
Sounds grim on a holiday week, but the first Thanksgiving was celebrated by less than half the Mayflower passengers who set out for America. The others died. Those remaining gave thanks for their survival, for being alive. They looked forward to surviving another year, and making it better if they could. They gave thanks for each other.
That isn't bleak. That's core to the best of humanity. It requires steadfastness. Resolution. Hopefully a lack of self-absorption. Being alert as well.
Thar still be some bars in them thar woods.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
How Do I(fill in the blank)?
I desperately need some help in baking.
I've used Crisco all my life. Haven't baked much the last 10 years and am making a comeback--EXCEPT the pie crust and bread have both come out greasy--the crust not short, and the bread not cohesive and draining oil. I currently have most of a can. I tried making an applesauce-mincemeat bread recipe today, using the recipe amount of 11/2 cups shortening. It was so greasy, it wouldn't hold shape and oil ran from the dough after cooking.
There HAS to be a conversion table. If your old recipe used X amount, now use Y. I'm guessing half. That would be cool. I've done a brief search and found comment sites complaining the same, but no company site giving me a conversion--you know, like a tablespoon fresh herbs converts to a teaspoon dried. Something like that. Toss in another egg? No instruction on the can. That seems shortsided to me. It's healthier--no trans fats. so please tell me how to use it.
I've talked to a good cook who used to bake a lot, but doesn't anymore, and she recommends I use half the Crisco called for. I'm wondering if that is enough or if there are other adjustments I need to make. She said she now uses pre-manufactured crusts or uses butter. Expensive, and today's shortening may be more healthful, but I don't know anymore. I'm not finding ready information from folks who do.
All I want to do is bake some stuff, using ingredients I know--but I don't know them any more.
No wonder all the food ads say cooking is hard and just buy----
Less and less I trust the products I buy. Now it extends to food. All I wanted to do was make a couple of loaves of bread for my son to take hog-hunting.
My frustration is palpable.
I've used Crisco all my life. Haven't baked much the last 10 years and am making a comeback--EXCEPT the pie crust and bread have both come out greasy--the crust not short, and the bread not cohesive and draining oil. I currently have most of a can. I tried making an applesauce-mincemeat bread recipe today, using the recipe amount of 11/2 cups shortening. It was so greasy, it wouldn't hold shape and oil ran from the dough after cooking.
There HAS to be a conversion table. If your old recipe used X amount, now use Y. I'm guessing half. That would be cool. I've done a brief search and found comment sites complaining the same, but no company site giving me a conversion--you know, like a tablespoon fresh herbs converts to a teaspoon dried. Something like that. Toss in another egg? No instruction on the can. That seems shortsided to me. It's healthier--no trans fats. so please tell me how to use it.
I've talked to a good cook who used to bake a lot, but doesn't anymore, and she recommends I use half the Crisco called for. I'm wondering if that is enough or if there are other adjustments I need to make. She said she now uses pre-manufactured crusts or uses butter. Expensive, and today's shortening may be more healthful, but I don't know anymore. I'm not finding ready information from folks who do.
All I want to do is bake some stuff, using ingredients I know--but I don't know them any more.
No wonder all the food ads say cooking is hard and just buy----
Less and less I trust the products I buy. Now it extends to food. All I wanted to do was make a couple of loaves of bread for my son to take hog-hunting.
My frustration is palpable.
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